THE GUILT final part

All through the day I was completely lost at the eaves dropped discussion. So I finally resolved to quit the job and get myself tested because from the discussion, the previous secretary of the boss who had resigned 6months ago due to health challenges  died of HIV a week ago.

Though I didn’t believe her HIV status had anything to do with my boss, I wasn’t very comfortable because if my boss could have an affair with me who is married then he could have also had an affair with her who was unmarried. So even though I was relunctant about getting tested I also felt there was a need to.
That same week, I went for the test and I got the shock of my life. I was HIV positive. It was at that point that I Suddenly remembered that I had seen my boss take some drugs regularly and every time I asked what they were for, he would say “hypertension”.
I was broken. I was bitter, confused and terrified so I called my boss and told him of my test results. Well, he didn’t say a word rather he hung up on me. Then, that very instant I sent him a text of resignation.
For about 2 months, I couldn’t eat. Though I tried to keep up a bright face at home mostimes I often ran into the bathroom to cry. Meanwhile I told my husband that I was fired and that I would want to stay off job seeking for a while since I had been able to save up a good amount of money from my recent job. I told him I had 2 million naira in my account whereas the actual money in my account was 15 million naira. I had that much because I wasn’t spending the money my boss was giving me. He gave me 500k each time we went out together and other times a million naira.
Well, My husband was glad I was no longer working there. He said he felt some sought of relief inside. “Only if he knew I was already HIV POSITIVE” …I thought to myself. Every time I had to go to the hospital for my drugs and for check up, I told him I was going to the market. So each time I was done with the hospital I always went to the market to get a few things so that he would not notice anything.
Then 6 months after my husband fell sick. I know you’d think he had gotten HIV too but I was sure he hadn’t because I made him use condom any time we slept together. I did so under the excuse of not wanting to conceive another baby yet. So, we began to treat typhoid and malaria. At first he began to recover and just when he was getting really strong and stable he became ill again. This time, worse  than before so we went to the hospital where he was admitted. They ran a series of test on him and found out that he had AIDS.
My husband screamed. He kept shouting “I have never cheated on my wife!” But they managed to calm him down and convince him that he may had gotten it from the barbing salon.
I felt pity for him but I couldn’t just bring myself to tell him the truth. Unfortunately, 6 months after, my husband passed away.
It’s been 2 years since he died and I just have not been able to forgive myself. He was innocent and didn’t just deserve to die the way he did. THE END!
 

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