This is a conversation between two men and if you’re battling to stop a particular bad habit, or feel like you deserve more in your relationship or marriage. As you listen to or read this story you’d be set free.
This story is like a healing balm to a wound . As you listen to or read it, you’ll see those strongholds break off your life easily.
James: I am tired of my wife. I don’t think I am ready to go on with this marriage anymore.
Mike: What is the matter? We have been friends for over 10 years now. Be sure you can count on me James. I have noticed your coldness to your wife for the past few days that I came visiting. I noticed you shout at her and all that. I thought it was one of those casual misunderstandings couples have. I didn’t know it was this serious. Please, what is the actual problem?
James: Mike, you don’t know what I go through in my marriage. My wife is too lazy. This woman literally starves me everyday. I can barely eat 3 times a day in my house. It’s either she cooks once a day or most times twice a day. I have complained several times. Whenever I do she ends up making me eat one particular kind of food twice a day or sometimes all through the day. Can you imagine?
How can I eat one particular food twice in a day? What is there in cooking three different kinds of meals every day?
I expect that she bathes our baby 5 times a day and feeds him 5 times a day. But she bathes him just twice. Which she sometimes does late and feeds him only when he cries for food . I have been patient enough. I have talked to her severally using different approaches yet, no change. The worst part of it is that she complains that I don’t talk to her nicely or treat her with respect. Well, I am not even motivated to treat with respect or treat her well. She is of no use to me. I benefit nothing from her. She’s just a woman of herself.
Mike, women of old went to the farm and yet took care of their homes. Her job is no excuse for being lazy. Our house gets swept twice a week, our bathroom is washed once a month, she can’t even go to the market… she asks the gateman all the time to go to the market for her. Mike, what in this world did I get married to ???
Mike: Ha ha.. My friend, I am also tired myself too. At least your wife cooks for you, mine cooks once in two days. We practically eat more fast foods than her food. She even feeds and bathes your baby twice a day, hmmm my wife prefers to give the baby water to drink whenever he cries, and feeds him just once a day. Sometimes my baby doesn’t get to bath in two or three days. No… She does this under the excuse of “The atmospheric temperature is too cold”. All she does is clean his bum with baby wipes and that is it. James, can you see this floor? It was last swept 3 weeks ago. Your wife does all that for you and you are complaining? You are practically enjoying James. But in all these, she’s your wife….
James: Don’t tell me that “she’s your wife” rubbish. Is that one a wife?…
(While they were still discussing, Mike’s wife Mike’s wife returns from work. What follows is Mike’s lovely reaction on seeing his wife)
Mike: My Honey Comb! My sweet heart! The love of my life! You are back.. Welcome… Come closer let me hug you. I hope you are not stressed today. Since today is my day off, I decided to prepare something delicious for you to eat…. Don’t worry, I’ll pick up Junior from the crèche in 15 mins. I love you babe…. All I need you to do is take your bath, rest, and I’d serve you like my queen. Let me get your bags for you….. My sweet wife…
Mike’s Wife: (looking excited and grateful) Thank you Darling. You are the best.. I love you….(she then goes inside afterwards)
(James and Mike are now once again alone in the living room)
James: Mike, what was all that rubbish for? Your wife doesn’t care for you yet you treat her that special????
Mike: Look here James…. I wasn’t blindfolded when I put those rings on her finger. You see that woman, I love her. Yes, she’s not really pleasing me but if my love for her has to depend on how well she treats me, then it’s not love. If she has to earn my trust by treating her as a lovely wife then I am a hypocrite.
She is my wife and she deserves my protection, my love and special treatment. She is my wife JAMES! Not any other woman, but she is my wife and my love is not for sale and I won’t allow her to buy it from me by doing the things I want. My love for her, is for free.
Besides, I rather allow her to make adjustments, whenever it dawns on her. I want her to see how great and unconditional my love for her is. I would prefer that, than for her to make adjustments on realizing how distant I am from her by treating her badly. No,let my unconditional love for her provoke her to make adjustments and not my putting her away. My love for my wife is for free.
JAMES, LOVE YOUR WIFE. She is a human being. Help her. She is your daughter. Treat her softly. With time she’ll respond to your needs with the perfect support and the perfect atmosphere of Love from you. As for me James, MY LOVE IS NOT FOR SALE!!
James: Wowww. I never saw it that way, you know.
Mike: James, JESUS LOVES YOU UNCONDITIONALLY right? And even in your imperfections His LOVE for you is perfect and ever burning towards you. Oh what a loving HUSBAND WE HAVE James.
So even though your lifestyle may not be pleasing to Him, He loves you and He is always good to you. Why not Make adjustments in your life in response to and appreciation for His unconditional love for you. That’s how it should be.
Wait, did I hear you say HOW CAN I STOP THAT BAD HABIT? Then talk to your husband JESUS, He’ll support and help you as long as you are willing to adjust in love. He wants you to come closer in love and not in fear.
So, James be an example of Christ to your wife. Love her. And in response to love, she’d adjust. But if you treat her badly, it is a bad foundation for your marriage. Love your wife as Christ loves you. If I must confess, your wife does a lot better than mine. But I can still find strength to love her. Well, I can’t say I am strong enough. But because my focus is onJesus I find it alot easier to love my wife with all her inadequacies. And I know by faith that she’d respond to that love and God would give her the strength to make the necessary adjustments and also help her. James, I have to go now. I need to look after my wife. If you don’t mind, I’ll see you later. Remember to think about all I have said. My regards to your wife.
From this story I WANT YOU TO SEE THE UNCONDITIONAL LOVE OF GOD FOR YOU. People may find it easier to love when a person deserves it. But God loves you even in your imperfections. It doesn’t matter what that bad habit is, or your inadequacies or the challenges and all. Rest on the love of God for you. It’s nothing like the love Mike has for his wife. Even James tried to emulate the love of Christ by overlooking the faults of his wife. Yet the love of God for you is way more than that. If you rest on Christ’s love for you and speak or meditate on His love for you, you’d find it so easy to get out of filth and rise up to address negative situations with the assurance that God loves you and would never fail you. You are loved. You are treasured by God.